Monday, Jul. 01, 2002 @ 5:40 pm
Sassy!

Judy Tenuta is fucking funny. We sat front row center at one of those tiny tables with another couple. Judy even brought the guy onstage. She also patted him on the head and said, "Ch-ch-ch-chia!" because he had a flat top. It seems she picked 2 or 3 guys in the audience to pick on, and called some of the women "little virgins." Luckily she left missleigh and I alone. She imitated Cher, Winona "Juggs", Tina Turner, Jennifer Lopez (with something stuffed into the back of her pants), Rita Rudner, and a couple others I can't remember. Oh, she also kept smacking her ass and saying "Sassy!" when she said something crude or insulted someone. I laughed until tears squirted from my eyes.

After hanging out at Leigh & Ken's apartment and entertaining/being entertained by her cat, Mo, we went downtown for the Lucky Yates Show at Dad's Garage. It started after midnight. After having slept about 4 hours Friday night, I was very tired. I perked up during the show, which was hilarious. The guests were the guy from "Beakman's World", drag queen DeAundra Peek, and a 3-piece puppet punk band called Clobber (yes, puppets). Emanuel Lewis, who was scheduled to appear, flaked out. Little bastard. A regular feature is Lucky interviewing someone from the audience after pulling their name from a hat. Missleigh was the lucky audience member. She did very well. I refused to put my name in the hat (they don't make you) because I'd be too self-conscious up there. I was also too tired to be funny. Leigh said you couldn't really see the audience because of the lights.

DeAundra Peek brought a trailer park recipe. The ingredients are cheese Ritz crackers, Cheeze Wiz, vienna weiners (pronounced vie-innur), and maraschino cherries. When she was showing how to build this delectable hors d'eurve, she said the cheese acted like Granny's Poligrip when you put the vie-innur on it. Yummy. She dumped the juice from the can into a cup to be used as "dippin' sawse." She brought an entire tray of them, and we could smell them as soon as it was opened. Eww. Made me think of Sling Blade - "It's a little loud" or "there's peckers in there."

Baby Jean Peek does a song called "Peepaw's Dead" to the tune of "Zombie" by the Cranberries. I think DeAundra and Baby Jean may be the same person. An afternoon DJ here plays the song on occasion. I've tried to find it online to download it, but have had no luck. If anyone sees it, please let me know. It is too funny. (Damn, I need a thesaurus. Funny - amusing, hilarious, witty, jocular? Um, no.)

I had not thought of the 45 minute drive home from Leigh's when I agreed to go to this show. Damn, it sucked. I got home between 3:30 and 4:00. Jeff told me later that he had just gotten back in bed after walking next door about the loud music. Apparently the bitchy (in a bad way) neighbor kicked her drunk boyfriend out and he was sleeping in his truck with the radio blasting. You've just gotta laugh.

I let my hair dry naturally Sunday, and it looked pretty good. Very curly. Last night I tried to duplicate what the stylist did. I didn't quite succeed. My hair feels dry, and I'm worried all this ironing and blowdrying is damaging it. I hadn't blown my hair dry in probably 6 or 7 years, and only occasionally straightened it with a steam iron thingy. I need more products. Before long, I'll have to use 5 or 6 products in my hair every day and "marinate" it before drying (like missleigh). Sometimes it sucks to be a girl (but not usually).

I know I seem to have gone on and on about my hair, but it's a big deal to me. It's like my security blanket, my woobie.




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The last five:
See ya! - Friday, Mar. 17, 2006
Where's the Excedrin? - Saturday, Mar. 11, 2006
don't even get me started - Tuesday, Mar. 07, 2006
I'm not mean, you're just a sissy. - Monday, Mar. 06, 2006
countdown to defection - Sunday, Mar. 05, 2006

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