I have read stories about people losing pets, then finding another pet who is their deceased pet reincarnated. I would not object to that. I have to wonder if we could be so lucky, though.

I feel like a big whiny sissy. Here it is about 3 months after the fact, and I'm still emotional and dwelling on it in my diary. Weetabix wrote one moving entry, a thank you in the next entry, and then has chosen not to dwell on it. Why can't I just leave it alone? Because it was so sudden and unexpected? The guilt?

Last week we got one of those postcards from the vet reminding us that Thor was due his yearly shots. Hello? I debated for a few days on whether or not I should call them and how I should handle it. I called yesterday and said, "I just got a reminder in the mail about Thor's yearly shots. He died in April in your office, so if you could take him off the list (or whatever you have to do) we'd appreciate it." She said she would, and that she was very sorry that happened (the postcard, though I think they are all sorry about Thor's death. I didn't even tell her my name. She knew who Thor was. They loved him there.)

See? I'm dwelling. It is my diary, so I guess I can do that if I want. I just feel like a sissy. I use this phrase often, but maybe the fact that I was raised by men gave me their attitude toward showing emotion. Emotion = weakness. It just seems that anything can set me off - that Pet Psychic show, Weetabix's diary about Chelsea, getting a postcard from the vet...okay, the last one is understandable. And then I hide it from everyone, especially Jeff. If anyone would understand, it would be Jeff. He did cry in front of me after seeing the sick dog at the vet's office in June. Also, we've been married for 11 years. We use the bathroom with each other in the room, and other embarrassing things. You'd think I would lose my self-consciousness after a while.

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Bwahahahahahahaa! (These things are addictive!)