At what point do I give Jeff an out and tell him I will never want a kid? I only toned down my comments to avoid agitating him or hurting his feelings. My feelings have not changed. On one hand, I feel like he should love me anyway. On the other, I don't want to feel like I'm depriving him of something.

I need to find a way to be more affectionate, too. I feel like I'm always pushing him away. In the evenings, I can barely sit down after working out, showering, cooking (usually) 2 meals, packing my lunch for the next day, cleaning up the kitchen, and getting ready for bed. So if he grabs me I'm just standing there waiting for him to let go so I can get shit done. I don't want to make him feel like my Dad makes my stepmother feel (despite her harping).